Posts Filed Under: television

Checked out Pee-wee’s Playhouse live at Club Nokia. That set alone was worth the price of admission. It was like walking into an episode of the late Saturday morning show, only updated slightly. A new character based off a ShamWow made an appearance, but suffered a horrible fate in an accident involving a deep fryer. It was almost as horrific as what happened to Vince, the ShamWow/SlapChop guy, in Germany.

As a special treat, a select few got to meet and greet with Paul Rubens after the show for a little Q&A. He let it out that the purpose of this live stage show is to gain traction for his new movie in development. Mr. Rubens then went on to explain the entire plot! Heavy stuff involving mermaids and zombies, and villain Chris Rock kidnapping the King of Cartoons. You heard it here first!

It’s “super cuts” like Street Fighter Stupidity HD Remix that make me so pleased that I wasn’t emotionally invested in Street Fighter II and knew that USA was running a cartoon based on the series. I’d watched (and loved) some loathsome half-hour toy commercial cartoons in the eighties (MASK, Silverhawks, C.O.P.S., G.I. Joe, etc.) but I’d also watched a lot of Robotech, making me a young animation snob. In hindsight, most of what I liked was pretty rotten stuff.

But this…

Check it! Friend of Meat Bun and co-host of Gametrailers TV Daniel Kayser spotted wearing one of my personal faves on last night’s episode. Not only is Daniel dripping with 99.44% pure high-grade “TV personality,” he’s a solid human being off-screen to boot. Plus he has the kung-fu grip of a man four times his weight. Big thanks to Daniel — and Jeremy Hoffman! — for the wardrobe credit. (Yeah, check the credits!)

It looks like things are engaging for Star Trek Online.  Spock has even been recommissioned to speak on the subject during a media event this weekend in Vegas (which you may watch live).

That’s honestly all I want to hear about it.  I have sworn off MMO’s forever.  I don’t want to know players travel through the galaxy by foot, by transporter beam, at impulse power, at warp, and via new transwarp conduits constructed by the Federation during the twenty years that have elapsed since Star Trek: Nemesis. Nor do I care there is both personal and ship-to-ship combat. And I’m not at all interested that over a hundred ships have been recreated in the game, at least 50 of these obtainable by players. None of these things matter to me because they are wrapped up in an MMO, and I will not be assimilated.

I prefer to let my warm ST:TNG memories fade and mutate into hilarious Internet memes.

Something you might not know about Meat Bun co-founder Scott is that he has a gift for pachinko. When we visited Akihabara a few years ago, with the above Evangelion promo was running at a pachinko hotspot — no photos allowed inside — his natural ball bearing aiming skills surfaced. We later had his wrists professionally gauged. Both joints have an average suppleness rating of 9.41, practically unheard of in a caucasian.

Sadly, as it appears that Tokyo Game Show is not in my future plans, I’m even more devastated to learn of the release of 24: The Pachislot, recently promoted by Carlos “Tony Almeda” Barnard and bikini model Aki Hoshino in Tokyo to great effect. There’s a PlayStation 2 version coming, but it just won’t be the same without the blaring sounds, the stench of Marlboros and the intense confusion of a pachinko parlor.

At least there’s shitty art.

Having just seen Keifer and Carlos at Comic-Con — this is about as hard as I nerd out, by the way — makes the inaccessibility of 24: The Pachislot that much harder on my being.

Perhaps the most distressing thing about skipping the annual Tokyo trip this year is that no Japanese commuters will find restful slumber upon our shoulders.